The other day I was thinking, and not for the first time either. I was thinking about the numerous achievements of man from the 1700s to the mid 1900s. We suddenly had some sort of mad catharsis, inventing, discovering and ass kicking. I ask what has happened? We invented and achieved so many things in the past, but it's been a boring assed time since the last major invention.
Let's look at the facts. Here's a list of inventions and achievements from yesteryear: and the advancements on them:
* We suddenly realised we could fly
- we made flying machines faster and put hot chicks on them to serve drinks (not a bad move)
* We landed on the moon
- we flew around a bit in space and left some junk up there
* We put music onto discs
- now they're still on discs... oh but wait, they're smaller! GENIUS
* Electricity was discovered
- we um, learnt how sell it to people
* Telephones were invented
- we still use them, only now they have no cords
* We discovered the magic of television
- Now we watch it on bigger screens which shows that are still rubbish
In the words of David Lister, We still can't even make a toupe that doesn't get big laughs.
Learning to fly was such a massive thing and what have we done since? Made toilets that flush would have to be the best we've come up with since then. Where the hell is time travel, teleportation and fully functioning robots that look exactly like Jessica Alba? It's a pretty poor effort you must admit.
Here's a visual interpretation of how smart we were back then as opposed to now.
In other words, we're shit.
People talk about aliens as those with a higher intelligence, then maybe the average person of 1800 is an alien.
I could say life is better now than back then, but I would be saying it sarcastically. I'm also not going to say that Teleportation has been on the drawing board longer than Robert Downey JR has been on crack. Where the hell is it? I want to be blown away by our own genius but our advancements are happening slower than it would take a quadriplegic to crack a boner.
Don't look at me for my contribution, I have already invented the literary masterpiece that is Mad Sophist.com. Since nothing substantial has been invented recently, this site is the modern day equivalent of morse code.
I propose we stop marveling in our own magnificence and get off our asses and change the world. Amen
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