In recent news, two Australian Football codes have been rocked by allegations that the players are rapists, drunks and a social menace. I bet you're thinking "OH MY, FOOTBALLERS ARE THUGS? IMPOSSIBLE!"

What a load of shit, how long did it take for people to figure out that Footballers are single celled organisms with as much social tact as a baboon with a rash on it's ass crack at a Royal luncheon?

Players have been accused of having drunken bonding sessions and gang raping women. Good one boys, that's the best way to attract the female demographic to the game, team rape them. While that kind of shit can only be brought to justice by means of lethal injection, I blame the media more than the footballers. For some reason they're making out like it's a giant shock that footballers are maniacal morons with their brains in their dicks.

This would be fine and dandy with me if the public didn't have such a fetish for asking them to comment on society. It's the same with celebrities.

"Woah a ship crashed and spilled oil on a penguin, Lets ask Mel Gibson what he thinks!"

Instead of interviewing experts, academics or generally normal intelligent people.. the media asks a footballer or a celebrity. Lets look at what questions Footballers and celebrities are qualified to answer, and what they're not qualified to answer.

Footballers

Qualified - What did you think of the game?

Not Qualified - Anything that's not "What did you think of the game?"

I'm actually being lenient here as ask a footballer about a game and it's the same old moronic shit.

"Ohh the boys and I came out hard, we gave 110%. We had to regroup at half time and it was hard but our defence was strong. Stevo played a good game and it got us home." Holy crap! Wet your pants with excitement and interest.

Celebrity Actors

Qualified - Did you enjoy being in the movie?

Not Qualified - What do you think about (insert anything here)?

It's great when an actor starts to tell us about the character like they wrote the story.

"Oh it was easy for me to get inside the character, they are very strong minded and fantastic, much like me"

Have you also noticed that every actor or actress thinks their character is the best?
One example is the guy who plays Saruman in the Lord of the Rings. The guy sais "He is the wisest, most powerful blah blah" only Saruman ends up getting his ass kicked.

I am sick to death of morons being on tv, but more so them thinking they have anything to offer to the world in the forum of the oral ejaculation of rubbish they call an opinion. You may say I'm doing the same, but people come here looking for my opinion... it's not tipped down their throats and it's never to be taken seriously anyway. I'm about as good a role model as a used syringe.

What happened after September 11? We asked Anthony Mundine about it. Here's a man who was that dumb he had to change from Football to boxing. He calls himself a Muslim caus he read a book about Malcolm X and liked the pictures. So Anthony says something like "America deserves it", and nearly gets suspended from boxing and has to apologise on tv. I blame the guy holding the camera as much as I do Anthony.. but god, he is the dumbest person to ever ruin a television screen.

I don't propose anything drastic, simply we kill all actors and footballers the moment they speak beyond their level of competence. This will surely restrict them to 3 word answers, therefore even worse viewing... but probably not enough to stop the media from putting them on tv.

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