If you insist on bringing some snot nosed little replica of yourself (you sick bastard) into the world then please take this quick test to see if you would be a suitable parent.

Having children is not like getting a dog. When you dump a dog because you realise it sucks you get fined. When you dump a child you go to prison. So to stop you fouling up your life or convince you that your child will grow up retarded knowing that you were too stupid to wear
a condom, I've compiled this little test.

How Old are you?

 

Select your age from the list Under 19 19-25 25-35 40-60 more than 60 (you sicko)

 

How many times have you thrown/had thrown a salami down your hallway.
To put that in simpler terms, are you a whorebag?

How many roots have you had none a few heaps more than I can count, I am a total whorebag!

 

Can you say "I'll withdraw before anything happens" in more than 2 languages?

Select yes or no yes (you fly guy) no

 

Did you like the show "look who's talking"

Yes or no yes - I am retarded of course not... it sucked

 

do you have any teeth missing?

yes or no yes no

 

Will you insist on allowing your bastard children to scream like the dirty little shits they are in the supermarket?

yes or no yes ( please kill yourself) no I will beat their asses (amen)

 

Have you ever boned any of your relatives?

select yes or no yes (sick inbred) no

 

Are you any of the following: A smack head, coke snorter, alcoholic or homosexual?

select one yes, smack head yes, coke snorter alcoholic I am a homo all of the above none of the above

 

Will you beat your kids?

yes or no of course I will (good for you) no- I am a gutless pussy who'd rather have a family meeting

 

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