Real Estate agents would have to be the most obnoxious repulsive people on satan's earth.
If you've failed school, have no qualifications and don't want to collect garbage then
real estate could be the answer for you.
You get to ring up people while they're having dinner and pretend you don't know where they live and try and get them to piss off and move.
You also get to knock on people's doors and watch them try desperately hard not to smash your face in with your own listing brochure.
What's even better is you get to prey off your own family's misfortunes and rake in the cash while they cogitate upon how much a for sale sign actually costs.
Real Estate agents are so condescending and smug yet to become one you only need to take a part time course that goes for less than a year. You don't even have to finish it, you can be registered and work even while you're only enrolled. Yet they still think they are gods gift and drive around in dickhead cars with personalized number plates that either say some ridiculous smug word or display their precious initials that nobody cares about.
Some people deserve real estate agents. Like the people who save those "free appraisal" pamphlets for a rainy day. APPRAISALS ARE FREE! In fact agents would sooner pay to come over to your place and talk about themselves, value your house and add a few hundred thousand so you get an erection and sign a contract.
If I see one more 19 year old male retard with greasy hair and a brand new suit walking around terrorizing my neighborhood I will take his shined up shoes and cram them up his mierda (ass.)
Real Estate agents would have to be on par with Jehovah's in the pain in the ass stakes. It's an easy way for school dropouts to get a certificate and swan about in a suit and tie just to impress their friends. You look like dipshits. You're about as professional as
the postman yet you pretend that you're something special just to feel like you've actually achieved something in your life.
Real Estate agents come in 3 choices:
1. A tarted up old bag who's seen more roots than a land care volunteer. She insists upon shoveling on the makeup to hide the fact that she has a face like a baboons rectum. She'll drive a flash car and smell like the perfume counter at grace brothers.
2. A skinny little greasy haired twirp walking around with a black folder and a steve urkel posture. Ask him a question about the property market and he'll drown in his own sweat and go bright purple. Because he doesn't know a damn thing yet if he doesn't get a listing this week he will be fired and they'll hire the next idiot to annoy the rest of the people in the suburb.
3. The middle aged sleazy con artist who hangs around high school girls netball courts on his days off. With a handshake like baseball glove filled with butter he'll make you realize why selling your house yourself was your first instinct. His car stinks of smoke and his family have all disowned him because he made a million dollars this year forcing them to buy property that went down the toilet.
So if you ever see one walking around, be sure to pull over and introduce them to the tire iron in your car boot. Once or twice in the temple is more than enough. Alternatively if you see one of their cars in the car park (they are easy to spot) be sure to whistle for a dog to come urinate on their tyres... it's more than they deserve.
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