Why Amitry Dry is good shark bait

If you don't know who Amity Dry is I envy you more than you could ever imagine.
To enlighten you anyway she is a self proclaimed singer songwriter who got on a
tv show called 'The block" where 4 couples get an apartment each to renovate
then they sell it.. riveting stuff. To make it even more enjoyable, one of the couples
were fudge packers who insisted on showing their anus to the camera each week, often in close proximity to food.
So Amity gets chosen and we meet her.. she seems great then she opens her mouth. She casually sais "One of my favourite songs at the moment is a SONG I WROTE CALLED THE SHITHOUSE." (oops I mean lighthouse)

What sort of conceited piece of work says stuff like that? So anyway, Australia forgives her thinking perhaps she was nervous and didn't know how to plug her no talent self.

But then it continues, an extract from her website:

"The Lighthouse"

This song is so special to me, I knew the minute I wrote it was special"

Of course you did dear, it's like when you fart and you can't smell it.. yet everyone
else thinks it stinks. Aren't you so special, we're all so lucky to have you poison our
airwaves. So she somehow manages to make the whole show about herself and pretends to be all humble and cute. Well I know I had to have my carpet shampoo'd on more than one occasion as I lost about 40 kgs bringing up my dinner.

Then it all starts to make sense:


"Growing up, my family went to church every Sunday and I used to love hearing my
parents and grandparents singing the hymns. As I started to develop a strong voice
I was encouraged get up the front and sing for everyone, and I soon found I loved
the way that felt" laughs Amity.

Wow I feel so wooly and warm inside, damn your grandparents to hell for encouraging you to get in front of people and pretend they all love you. You loved the way it felt when the world revolved around yourself you queef, just like the Block.

Amity goes on later talking about her music and her university course:


At the end of the course Amity began sending out to demo tapes to record companies. "I thought I'd be famous within a year" laughs Amity

Haha! I'm glad you're laughing because it's a joke! I hope you don't think you were chosen for the block for any other reason than that you are blonde and have boobs.

It continues to crap on:


"All I ever wanted is for my songs to touch people, "Amity says. "I want people to
feel as if I wrote it for them, about them, and if they can relate it to their life
and feel moved by my songs then that is reason why I write music. It's a pretty good job!"

Blach blah blah vomitization. "All I ever wanted.." " I want people to..." blah blah blah
me me me. Who gives a shit what you want. The reason you write music is to be surrounded by people who massage your ego on a daily basis, I will gladly massage it with plastic explosives.

Do us all a favour and stop thinking you were ever anything special. The lighthouse sucks, you talentless hack.

*UPDATE* This page was ordered to be taken down by Amity Dry.com. Check here for full details

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